Some Observations on the New NFL Season

Television Coverage

• FIRE JOE BUCK. He’s not a great baseball announcer, but he’s worse at football. I realize I may be the only person in the country who feels this way: A Twitter search for #firejoebuck came back empty. Troy Aikman, on the other hand, is a great analyst. I may be prejudiced, since we’re both UCLA graduates.
• SCRAP CLETUS. Cletus (or Cleatus) is the idiotic dancing robot featured on FOX. What the hell is the point? Amazingly, this idiotic construct is available as a freaking action figure! Sorry, no link to that; consider it my way of removing temptation.
• I’m noticing a trend here, so let me just get it out there right now. Note to Roger Goodell: Fire Fox Sports.
• While you’re at it, Commissioner, how about enfranchising the vast majority of NFL fans who do NOT have DirectTV. Just a thought.
• ESPN, just thought you might like to know: "NFL Gameday" is starting to show its age. I love Chris Berman, but I’m getting really tired of his sad efforts to mimic John Facenda. It’s not even campy anymore. Incidentally, quarterback is the most important position in the game. WHY is there no QB on the Gameday set? (No, do NOT bring back Joe Theisman!) By the way, most of the people reading this never saw Mike Ditka coach a game in the NFL. I’m just sayin’…
• Dan Fouts and Brian Billick are arguably the best analysts in the game today, along with Aikman. In fact, Fouts can give Aikman a run for his money, and the perspective of a respected coach like Billick is pretty refreshing.
• Peyton Manning is the best pitchman in the game. Peyton plus little brother Eli: Unstoppable.
• Best commercials: The CBS and Fox spots for NCIS/NCIS: Los Angeles and Bones, respectively, if for no other reason than to remind us the new season starts this week.
• Worst commercials: All the rest. I can’t wait for Tuesday so we won’t be inundated with ads for the Wolverine movie. Dishonorable Mention: Valvoline. Worst Product (I know it isn’t brand-new): Bud Light Lime. Anyone who calls that "beer" should be shot. Often.

Football Notes

Living where I do, I get "local" games, plus the late "national" game (assuming it’s not a "local" team). For us, "local" means Denver Broncos, Minnesota Vikings, and maybe the Green Bay Packers. Unfortunately for me, I’m not a fan of any of those teams. I realize that’s my bad luck, but I can’t convince my wife to move to Missouri for the NFL season (I am an unabashed Rams and Chiefs fan). If we moved to San Diego, I’d quickly convert to being a fan of the Chargers, but only when they wear powder blue.

So on Sunday, I was privileged to watch the Broncos at Cincinnati, and the Vikings at Cleveland. I guess if I lived in Ohio, I’d have seen the same games. I picked the Bengals and Vikes. My feeling with the Broncos was, Carson Palmer (Bengals QB) would be able to overcome Kyle Orton and the Broncos. The Browns have been a model of ineptitude since before they were moved to Baltimore; the current reincarnation hasn’t been impressive. And say what you will, but Brett Favre is still Brett Favre. Brady Quinn isn’t.

The biggest "Oh WOW!" play of the day was the Denver touchdown with 11 seconds left. Having no rooting interest in either team, I can only imagine how sick the Cincy fans must be after that pass was tipped, caught and run in. On the other hand, if Cincy had taken advantage of (a) the onside kick they recovered to start the game or (b) not blown a chip-shot field goal early on, they might not have been in that position in the first place.

The Vikes-Browns game was pretty boring for much of the game, but eventually, you had the feeling (well, I did, anyway) that sooner or later, Favre and Adrian Peterson would get it together. They did, with the expected outcome. I’m still not ready to give the Vikings a free pass to the Super Bowl, or even to the playoffs. Can you imagine a 12-4 team not making the playoffs? While I doubt that will happen, it seems a lot more likely in the NFC Central than it does in the NFC East.

Speaking of the overhyped NFC East… As I write this, there are 10 minutes left in the 3rd quarter of the Giants – Redskins game. It’s 17-7 Giants, and the only reason it’s that close is because the Giants got suckered on a fake field goal just before the half (just one reason the G-Men will NOT be in the Super Bowl, by the way). Why FOX thought this would be the premier game on Sunday is beyond me. Folks, the Redskins are the worst team, by far, in the NFC East. In fact, I daresay they would be better than third in the NFC Worst West! Coincidentally, the other two late games today are games involving all four NFC West teams: St. Louis at Seattle, and San Francisco at Arizona. Both of these games are more compelling than the "national" game.

Tonight’s Green Bay – Chicago game should be a barn-burner. Two excellent young quarterbacks get a chance to walk the talk. I’ll be rooting for the Packers, because Aaron Rogers hasn’t claimed to have a better arm than either Bart Starr or Brett Favre. No, I’m not a Jay Cutler fan.

Finally, the Monday night games. As is usual the past couple years, we get a kickoff double-header. Why, oh why does one of these games always have the gawdawful Oakland Raiders? In Major League Baseball when ownership no longer has the interests of the sport at heart (see Schott, Marge), the commissioner steps in. Al Davis is ruining a once-proud franchise. The Raiders, however, are no longer hated, or feared. They are simply to be pitied. That’s the late game; the early game will be a blowout of the Bills by Tom Brady and the Patriots. I suspect Bill Belichick will want to prove that Brady is 100 percent. 

If I’m still fired up on Tuesday, I may list my top 10 or 12 teams after Week 1. If I do, I suspect there will be at least three AFC teams before any NFC team is listed, and perhaps four or five.

Any other NFL fans out there? Tell me where you disagree (or heck, stroke my ego and tell me where you agree!). Just in case I pick up some new readers: Keep your comments nice. Flagrant fouls will be penalized by disqualification.